A Life Well Lived In The Friend Zone

Some of us would consider the “friend zone” as a terrible place to be in. Where your hopes and dreams of being in a romantic relationship with the person you wish to be with are crushed to tiny little pieces.  It’s like having a debilitating disease which gives you little or no choice at all. Either you give in or choose to fight, only to prolong your agony and still die of the same illness or worse, its complications.

You see, our choices, sometimes make our lives a little bit more complicated than it already is. You love the girl you know you can’t have. You love the guy you know you can’t have. Why choose to love someone you know won’t commit in the first place? Has the idea of unrequited love been so enticing that it’s worth going through? I wonder.

Loving that person is a choice. In that moment, you could have turned and walked away. But you discovered,  you’re not selfish enough to want to let go and all you ask is a bit more time to spend with the person you hope can reciprocate the feelings you have for him/her.

You deny yourself the happiness you truly deserve in exchange for the small joy the “friendship” brings. You are hooked by the intensity of your emotions.  You get addicted to the dream. You enjoy an exquisite torture. You believe you’re doing yourself a favor. You think you have a life well spent in the friend zone.


Your brain probably fogged by desperation, you make excuses to be there for that person by being the “good friend”. And by being one, you shamelessly lend an ear when he/she needs someone to talk to. You listen to how fucked up his/her relationship with their respective partners. Then the tide turns and the delusional human ego shoots up.

You get all confident and take on the opportunity to confess your longstanding love. How you have loved him/her from afar, for God knows how many changing seasons or years. You try to change his/her mind to give you a chance. Then he/she looks at you in a weird, confused, sometimes, disgusted kind of way and drops the truth that he/she isn’t interested. Romantically speaking, that is. Such rejection can efficiently ruin a man or a woman! But then, there are those lucky souls whose unrequited love gets reciprocated. SOME, NOT ALL. I just want to make that clear. I didn’t mean to spread false hopes but you just might end up with the man or woman you’ve dreamt of!

So, you see, being in the friend zone is not as bad as what I made it sound to be. Unless, of course, there are other circumstances that may affect the situation. If being in this situation is or was your own choice, you probably had an idea or two on how to spend a well lived life in the friend zone beforehand. And if not, why we end up in this situation sometimes tell us that it’s alright to grow up and it’s life’s own way of teaching us a lesson. Harsh at times but definitely valuable.

Cheers to a life in the friend zone! Remember, you can always get out of it anytime.

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